“Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment.”

- Damon Runyon

Man, people say the Ron Paul "Paul-bots" are obsessive, but checking out Hugh Hewitt's blog the past couple of times makes me think there's been some kind of Rom-bot Invasion of the Party Snatchers. There's a new post every 17 minutes defending Mitt Romney or blasting McCain, or both, and absolutely nothing else. Even a headline suggestive of an economics story is written in terms of what it means to Romney's candidacy. If we knew the world was going to end in 3 hours Hugh's headline would be "Apocalypse snatches victory from Mitt's grasp at the last moment."

Oh well, Mitt seems like a decent sort. If it's between him and McCain I'd vote for Romney, or some 6th or 7th party candidate, before I'd vote for McCain. Or maybe I'll just go get a tooth filled instead. This race just isn't that interesting or amusing to me.

Not like the other side of the fence where The Big O is facing off against the Big Uh-Oh. Do you remember back in 8th or 9th grade when people would start shouting about a "girl-fight" and you'd push your way through the crowd to get a good view — and then start pushing your way back out again after getting hit with a handful of hair? Man, girls fight nasty and yet everyone assumes they're so much more refined and cultured than boys. Just try to look away, though. Similarly Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton race around trying to convince the Dem's flotilla of special interest groups that he or she is the biggest victim and worthy of their vote. It's as compelling as watching "Real Life Stories of the ER", without that annoying message warning of graphic scenes. Plus there's always the chance of seeing Bill Clinton wag his, um, finger at us again. Good times.

Then, just as you think the story is all played out, there's a shocking twist like Teddy Kennedy endorsing Obama. That reminded me of another episode from my younger days. Ever play "Risk", the game of world domination? Do you remember the visceral thrill you got when one of the players from a strategic alliance that had been cleaning up the board suddenly turned on his partner and struck from the rear? Yeah, you knew it was inevitable but it still gave you a pleasant shiver. This was even better than John Kerry forsaking his running mate Edwards a couple of weeks ago to jump on the Obama wagon. I can just hear Obama saying "Thanks, John, now would you mind not standing so close to me when the cameras are clicking?" I didn't see the Kennedy endorsement coming, though, at least not this soon. I don't know, maybe Ted thought Obama was an Irish name?

Speaking of alliances, some are saying that the distant third place Democrat candidate John Edwards is in line to be Obama's attorney general. Wow, a trial lawyer and union puppet as head of the Justice Department? He'd make Halliburton look like a couple of neighborhood kids opening a lemonade stand.

1. Don't tug on Superman's cape.

2. Don't spit into the wind.

3. Don't post pictures of yourself participating in illegal activities on Facebook.

The children are upset because Eden Prairie High School is disciplining them for breaking school rules about drinking by suspending several students from athletic teams or extra-curricular activities (presumably not drinking related). "Unfair!" they say as they stalk to their corners (or stage a walk-out).

For educational purposes, let's examine this logic. The students and their parents sign agreements not to drink alcohol while participating in school events (or presumably while eligible to participate), such as sports. The student breaks that pledge and the school finds out through photographic evidence. What part of basic cause and effect did you not learn in class? The school is enforcing its rules, and you should hope that the State of Minnesota doesn't try to enforce it's rules (called "laws", btw) as well since underage drinking is, like, you know, illegal.

And no, my darlings, this isn't a violation of privacy or free speech. First, if you put something in a public place or space, it's not private. Second, while your posting of it is speech, the punishment isn't because you posted, per se, but because the pictures were of you doing something that broke your word, the rules and the law.

This lesson is over. Now, get back to class because I don't think you can afford to miss many more.